If we could identify the offender, I would support making him pull it out himself. With his bare hands. And have to give it a couple of chews before throwing it away. Just for being a douche.
Today in the men’s room, I noticed that someone had spit his gum into the urinal. What a jerk. We all know it's just going to sit there until some poor janitor has to pick it out. Would it really have been so hard for the culprit to wait until he finished his business and spat it in the trash instead? There’s no reason to be so inconsiderate.
If we could identify the offender, I would support making him pull it out himself. With his bare hands. And have to give it a couple of chews before throwing it away. Just for being a douche.
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I often hear people talk about how things should be fair, as if it’s some sort of inalienable right. Fact: life is not fair. Some people have opportunities, gifts, and abilities that others will never possess. And yet we instill the idea in children that all things should be fair. “Bring enough for the whole class.” “Everyone gets an award for participation.”
We need to make a distinction between fairness and equality. Yes, all people are created equal, in that they have the same value and inherent worth. But that does not mean that everything is going to be fair. And I think we need to be very careful about "leveling the playing field." Instead of giving every kid a meaningless trophy, why not offer additional practice sessions for the children who want and need them? Or help those children find other things that they are good at? My point is, let's reward those who earn it, while also creating opportunities for everyone to have the chance of finding their own version of success. I love a challenge that hits that perfect sweet spot. You know the one: it’s not too easy, not too hard. Like baby bear’s porridge, it’s juuust right. A puzzle that requires lateral thinking is a perfect example. Initially stumped, you spend a few minutes contemplating. And just when you think you might give up, a new thought occurs and you stumble onto the answer. The feeling of satisfaction you feel afterwards is like no other.
I believe that challenges of this nature are a prerequisite to a fulfilling life. Not just puzzles, but challenges in one’s career, physical exercise, and relationships. If everything is too easy, we get bored. If everything is too hard, we get frustrated. So fill your life with challenges that are juuust right. Like most people, I'm sure I tend to remember things a little better than they actually were. My most recent foray down memory lane occurred while mowing the lawn when I chose to forgo listening to my usual podcasts in favor of a 90's Pop station on Pandora. Like the smell of buttery popcorn reminds me of a movie theater, these cheesy tunes transported me back to the halls of my junior high and high school.
Specific songs triggered specific memories of people and places. It was quite interesting, really. But then the songs quickly spiraled downward. Matchbox 20 followed Vertical Horizon, and when Savage Garden came on next, I knew it was time to be done. And that's the thing with nostalgia, you need to keep it brief and sporadic enough so that the memories remain untarnished by the realization that the things you loved my not be as great as you thought. I noticed a lot of sentiment on Facebook over the series finale of The Office, which aired last Thursday. While I enjoyed the series for most of its duration, I was disappointed with the finale.
The show breaks the bounds of believability for me whenever it portrays the co-workers as a tight group of friends. There are certainly workplaces where deep relationships are forged, but on The Office, it almost always comes off as contrived and inconsistent with the characters' personalities. The show often portrays the co-workers as being closer to each other than any other friends or family they may have, which always ruins my suspension of disbelief. There is no way that a Stanley or an Angela or a Phyllis would give up part of their weekend to attend a co-worker's daughter's first baptism. And the culmination of this inconsistency occurred near the end of the series finale. Dwight and Angela, two of the show's most unfriendly and socially awkward characters, just got married and--instead of going on their honeymoon--went back to the office to hang out with their co-workers. At which point Angela says the most ridiculous line ever spoken on television: "Oh, the honeymoon can wait until tomorrow. We wanted to hang out with you guys. I mean, when are we all going to be here together again?" I'm sorry, but even the most friendly and amicable of co-workers would not push back a honeymoon to hang out at the office, let alone these two characters. Again, it felt contrived and inconsistent, created solely for the purpose of bringing the cast together for a final sendoff. This completely broke the "mockumentary" style that the show was filmed in, and confirmed my suspicions that the show had outlived itself. You can’t overstate the value of a good night’s sleep. For years I’ve had the ability to fall asleep instantly, sleep soundly all night, and wake up refreshed and ready to take on the day.
There are several intentional factors that contribute to my sound slumber: 1) I maintain consistent sleep patterns. I go to bed at the same time every night and wake up at the same time every morning. 2) I don’t oversleep. I’ve trained my body to run on about six and a half hours, so when it’s time to fall asleep, my body and mind are good and ready. 3) The last thing I do before I fall asleep (aside from kissing my wife goodnight) is read a book. I read until I find my eyes repeating the same sentence with little comprehension, then force myself to finish that paragraph, and immediately turn off my reading light. I typically only need to read a couple pages before my mind is ready for slumber. 4) I maintain good posture during my slumber by sleeping on my back. I also keep a thick memory foam pillow next to my bed for when I feel the need to sleep on my side. I tuck it between my knees and ankles to keep my hips supported and legs parallel, further contributing to good posture. For years I've been intrigued by the behavioral element of economics. One of the more interesting topics is the “cobra effect,” which occurs when an incentive is implemented to modify behavior, but has the opposite consequence of that intended.
The phrase originated in colonial India, where the British government in Delhi decided that in order to reduce the city’s snake infestation, they would pay a bounty for every cobra skin that the citizens turned in. Makes sense, right? It certainly did to the denizens of Delhi, since the population began breeding and farming cobras to turn in for bounties. When the government realized what had happened, they ended the bounty. With no incentive to maintain their farms, the breeders then released the snakes into the city, resulting in a far worse case of cobra infestation than before the bounty was in place. * But this happened a long time ago, surely governments have learned that incentives don’t always work the way they intend, right? Wrong. “Texting while driving causes crashes, but state laws banning the practice do not seem to stop drivers from doing it. In fact, such laws might even make things worse by prompting drivers to hide their phones and therefore take their eyes off the road while texting.” ** Both cases are quite fascinating and yet extremely unfortunate. * http://www.freakonomics.com/2012/10/11/the-cobra-effect-a-new-freakonomics-radio-podcast/ **Wheelan, Charles. Naked Statistics. W.W. Norton & Company, Inc, 2013. Page 88. It seems like a lot of people are afraid to admit when they don’t know something. As if it’s a reflection of their intelligence. I would argue that it actually takes wisdom to admit when you don’t know something; only a fool tries to answer a question he does not understand.
I’m guilty of this myself sometimes. An ideal response would be, “That’s a great question. Let’s find out together!” Before I became a father, I was always perturbed by parents who could not keep their babies from crying in inappropriate places. Since having a baby of my own, my new response is to feel sorry for the parents. While I do my best to refrain from bringing my baby to venues like nice restaurants, I am no longer bothered by a crying infant at the local Denny's.
Now, older children who are simply misbehaving? I have no sympathy for those children or their parents. But who knows? My perspective may shift yet again when my own enter childhood. It’s been a while since I've attended a wedding, but back in my early to mid-twenties, I went to quite a few. Some were immensely fun, others were sometimes painful. And at each wedding, it was obvious to me what made the event enjoyable for everyone: bride, groom, bridal party, and all attendees. It was an observation that I was very intentional about implementing into my own special day:
Think of the guests first. This may seem like a counter-cultural statement, where the norm is making it “the bride’s day.” Don’t get me wrong, the bride and groom are central to the entire event, but if they want it to be one that the guests remember fondly, they should make every decision with the guests’ enjoyment in mind. Here are some examples... 1) Keep the ceremony short. Twenty to thirty minutes, tops. 2) Do all the pictures before the ceremony so guests are not waiting hours between the ceremony and reception. (Yes, I said “all” pictures. It’s not a big deal if the groom sees the bride before she walks down the aisle; it makes the event no less special.) 3) Serve awesome food. 4) Invite people who are willing to have fun. Enjoyable atmospheres are contagious. |