One of the most impactful chapters I ever read in a book is from The Traveler’s Gift by Andy Andrews. Specifically, the chapter on forgiveness with Abraham Lincoln. In the story, Lincoln shares how forgiveness is not really for the benefit of the offender, but for the forgiver.
I’ve had things happen at various times in my life that have made me so mad. “I can’t believe he would do that!” “I can’t believe she said that!” Sometimes I would find myself thinking about it for days, consuming my thoughts and emotions.
But in Andrews’s book, he explains that when you come to a place where you can forgive someone (whether they ask for it or not; whether they deserve it or not), you are releasing the control that the other person has over you. They may not have even realized that that they offended you, and forgiving them in your heart lets you move on.
I completely empathized with this chapter in the book and find it true in my own life. It doesn’t always seem like it is easier to forgive than to stew in the juices of your own anger and frustration, but I refuse to give anyone else that sort of control over my thoughts, time, and emotions. And so I forgive and move on. It really does end up being easier that way.
I’ve had things happen at various times in my life that have made me so mad. “I can’t believe he would do that!” “I can’t believe she said that!” Sometimes I would find myself thinking about it for days, consuming my thoughts and emotions.
But in Andrews’s book, he explains that when you come to a place where you can forgive someone (whether they ask for it or not; whether they deserve it or not), you are releasing the control that the other person has over you. They may not have even realized that that they offended you, and forgiving them in your heart lets you move on.
I completely empathized with this chapter in the book and find it true in my own life. It doesn’t always seem like it is easier to forgive than to stew in the juices of your own anger and frustration, but I refuse to give anyone else that sort of control over my thoughts, time, and emotions. And so I forgive and move on. It really does end up being easier that way.